Wednesday, September 24, 2014


*steps up on feminist soapbox*
*sets fire to oppressive under garments*


Dear McDonald's

I realize that the mere fact I'm choosing to nourish my child with your "food" probably negates the following rant. But nonetheless...

When ordering a Happy Meal, why do you need to know the gender of my child? Instead ask me if my child would like to grow up to be a grotesque slutty Barbie or an engineer. 

Ask me if she'd rather choose a letter and number to figure out her Monster Slut name (the results of which don't even make sense. 4+D=Claw-Elle? Really?)

Or would she rather play with a Hex Bug robot, test her knowledge and exercise her brain a bit with a cryptic message that uses math principles in the decoding process?

I thought by answering "girl" you might follow up with "monster slut or science nerd?" But apparently according to McDonalds, girl=monster slut. Girl doesn't equal boy. No way. No how. Your employee almost seemed offended when I said "she's a girl but wants the hex bug." 

"Oh so your daughter wants the boy's toy?" He replied confused. 

I was just happy she was too busy telling her sister about her favorite part of the Lego Movie to hear that comment. 

For the record McD's, my little girl's uterus doesn't stop her from being the official class bug catcher. She actually really digs science and tries not to let that surplus of X chromosomes get in the way too much. 

Thanks for asking questions though. The one about apples or Gogurt was a good one. She stuck to her gender and chose the apple. Hopefully she doesn't give it to a boy at school and doom her kind for all eternity. 


Mother of two future Monster Hoochies

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